Focussing on reality is the problem

Image by: Mark Hunter

If your relationship is not working properly then it is your reality.!

If you are financially broken then it is your reality..!!

If your body is diseased then it is your reality…!!!

Now, if you are a person who like to live with the reality and facts then it will become a problem. You will make your problems even worst by giving your attention to your facts and reality. Your focus on the reality will amplify the reality. Then you will start noticing more specifics and more details.

When you focus on the facts you miss the possibilities.

Although facts are real but possibilities could also become real if only you pay attention to them. Right now possibilities does not exist in reality but you can bring them into reality just by paying more attention to them than your facts and reality.

When you complain about your alcoholic husband, when you gossip about your selfish business partner, when you curse your financial situation, when you worry about your health then you are actually amplifying your problems. It is like you are doing affirmations for negative outcome. Then you will make your problems more vivid and bright in your mind. You will add more and more details to them by mental repetition and verbal discussion.

Your present condition and problems are created by the thoughts and emotions you entertained in the past. Now you are focusing on that present reality and giving it momentum. Obviously the same situation will be continued in the future. If you are observing your complicated relationships, talking about them with your friends, consulting about them with therapists then you are adding more momentum to your problems because you are focusing more and more on your problem.

Have you observed that a rich get richer and a poor gets poorer? A rich gets richer because he is focused on the money which he already “have”. And a poor is focused on the “lack”. Both are focused on their own reality (facts) and both are amplifying their reality.

Now another interesting point, you do not have to have money to attract money, but you cannot feel poor and attract money. If you could shift your attention towards money, if you could create the emotions and feelings of wealth and prosperity and ignore the fact of scarcity and lack then you will create wealth. You don’t need money to attract more money, you need proper emotions and feelings of wealth to attract wealth.

If a relationship is going smoothly and you focus on it then it will become more and more juicer. It will get better and better. If a relationship is not working and if you focus on it to find out “what’s going wrong” then you will find more and more things that are going wrong and your attention will amplify them and your attention will add more momentum in that direction and finally you will get divorced.

Now another interested thing, suppose your relationship is working properly but you focus on someone else relationship which is not working properly then those problematic images will get mixed with your own mental images and you will create the same situation for yourself within few days or months. This process works like self hypnosis.

You become what you see.

Now coming back to our topic. Your present moment and your reality is nothing but the outcome of your previous attention. We habitually pay attention to the same reality. For example if you regularly walk on the same road then you rarely notice new people, new vehicles, new buildings. You think that it is the same old road but everything is changing. Everything is new. You are not aware of the change. If you pay attention to “what is changing” then your reality will also change otherwise you will always believe that it is the same old road.

Same thing happens when you meet people. You think that this is the same person I meet yesterday and this is the same person I meet everyday. No sir, he is changing all the time. Reality is changing all the time but our expectation is the same. We expect people to behave in a certain way. We expect that there will be a problem and because of our expectation we try to find out evidence and finally we get the evidence.

If the reality is painful then ignore it. Don’t observe it. Because your attention will only amplify it. Then you will become the part of that problem. Instead anticipate the solution. Instead of complaining about your husband or wife try to find out something good in them and focus on that good thing, amplify it, magnify it, make it more vivid and clear. Forget about “what’s not working” and try to find out “what is working”. If you could find out “what is working” even if it is very small and pay attention to it then you will feel much better.

Try a little experiment. When you get headache just lie down on your bed and close your eyes. Move your attention towards your toes and notice that there is no pain in your toes. Then move your attention towards your legs and notice that there is no pain in your legs. Notice and observe each part of your body (except your head) that is working perfectly without any pain and you will understand what I mean. If you focus on your head your pain will increase but if you shift your attention towards different parts of your body then your pain will begin to disappear.

Look for prosperity in life. I’m not talking about your personal life because most people believe in scarcity and lack. So ignore your personal life and look around for the evidence of prosperity and abundance. Look at the stars, look at the clouds, look at hills, look at big shopping malls, luxurious cars, look at buildings, look at technology and progress. You are surrounded with wealth and prosperity. Very soon you will realize that you are living in a rich world. If you observe wealth and riches around you then your personal life will begin to shift in the direction of wealth and riches. But if you focus on your personal life, scarcity and lack then you will remain stuck with that.

If you are observing reality and reality is creating sensations of discomfort in your body and your mind then it is time to shift your attention. Then it is time to observe a better reality. I’m not an expert but Quantum physics says something like this that when you are reading this post there is no wall behind you unless you turn your back and observe that wall. In the same way there is no prosperity unless you shift your focus towards prosperity. It is not hard work, it is not good luck but it is just your attention.

Focusing on the reality when it is not working is the problem but focusing on the reality when it is working well is the solution. It doesn’t matter if that reality is just imagined or virtual.

If your relationship is not working properly and you focus there and try to find out why it is not working then you will give momentum to the problem and amplify that problem even more. But if you focus on ANY relationship that is working well and try to find out “why it is working well?” then your own problem will disappear. If you stop complaining about your relationship and admire those relationships which are working well around you and appreciate those people then you are focusing on that which is working well. Then those images will get mixed in your own mental images and you will pick up the VIBES and you will pick up the RHYTHM of harmonious and happy relationships.

I’m not saying that you should stop living in the present moment and live all the time in some daydreaming state or in hallucination or imagination. No, I’m just suggesting you to gently shift your attention towards more harmonious, more healthy, more prosperous reality. Because what you see you become. The observer, the observed and the process of observation are not separate things. They are one.

5 thoughts on “Focussing on reality is the problem”

  1. Very well conveyed the idea MG…1 question…what if you r surrounded by the ppl who’s talk and actions make you focus on scarcity, fear and mostly whats negative…like family members itself.

    1 more que..not related to this post, maybe u can write new post on this…ppl say that being ambitious is not good and at the same time, it is said that we should work to achieve our dreams…so what is the difference?..Another thing should ppl keep goals in life?

    1. Aniket, we can not control what others are believing, thinking or talking. We can not hack their mind. Don’t pay attention to it. It is their story.

      Yes, we are all surrounded by negative people but we should try to shift our focus deliberately towards something else. Their beliefs or opinions has no power or influence over you unless you allow it. If you make positive changes in your life then there is possibility that they will also pick up your beliefs.

      You asked that people say that being ambitious is not good.

      (Ambition synonyms: aspiration, intention, goal, aim, objective, object, purpose, intent, plan, scheme, mission, calling, vocation, desire, wish, design, target, end, dream, hope)

      Ambition means a strong desire to do or achieve something. In my view it is not wrong to have a strong desire to do or achieve something as long as you do not harm others in any way. There is nothing wrong in having ambition as long as you are not ruthless.

      Having an intention or desire is natural. When you see scarcity you desire prosperity, when you are diseased you desire health, in suffering you intent happiness, when there is confusion you seek clarity. So the point is that you can not live in a desire-less state. This is a fact and everybody should accept it. In 24 hours you are making literally hundreds of intentions.

      If there is a pure ambition/desire/intention of having something then there is no problem. Suppose you want higher education or you want to travel the world or you want to become a millionaire then there is no problem. You can achieve anything you desire. But our ambitions are mixed with doubt, fear and negative expectations. That’s why most people get mixed results.

      One should just set the goals and let go and enjoy the present moment. When you doubt whether you will be able to achieve your goals or not, you will create mixed results. Doubts and fears block your way. When you order food in hotel you know that it will come. You should keep the same attitude with your goals.

      When you set goals you give your mind a direction. Without a direction it will wander everywhere. Yes, you can live in the present moment forever without setting goals and that is okay. But in my view you can set goals and still live in the present moment. You can go into meditation and still you can become wealthy and prosperous. You can go on spiritual journey and still have six pack abs.

      You are here to enjoy the life. Set goals, achieve the things you desire but take all this as a game. Set goals but don’t get too much attached to them. Never say that I will be happy only when I will achieve this goal. You should enjoy every step towards your goals. In the past spiritual masters said that you should drop the ambitions and desire. I say you should drop the attachment to the results and enjoy the unfolding of your desires. You should find your happiness before you achieve your goals.

      Drop the goal and achieve the target. Once you set a goal relinquish your attachment to the result otherwise your mind will create doubts and fears. Enjoying the present moment helps you immensely to achieve your goals effortlessly because then you never waste your energy in stress, tension, fears and doubts. Only your fears and doubts prolong your desired outcome.

      Yes I’ll write a detail post about this as soon as possible.

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